请帮忙看看这篇翻译有什么地方要改进
鄙人英语水平有限,想翻译一些散文来自娱自乐,提高英语水平.不过没人指点也不知对错.
Idislikethemanwhoturnoffhisphoneat0:00.
Inthenight,youmisshimsuddenlyandaredyingtotellhimyoulikehim.Yougetupthecouragetogetthroughhisphonenumber,fancythathistelephonemessagecomesovertheline:
"Ican'tanswerthephonenow,pleaseleaveyourname..."
Thereisnothingworsethanyoucanonlyhearhismessagewhenyouarelonely.
Sometimes,hedoesn'tturnoffhistelephone,butitisre-routedpagingcenters.Inthenight,youreallywanttohearhisvoice.Fancythataformalvoicepasswhenthephoneisconnected:
"Who'scallingtheowner?"
Shouldyoupaginghim?Yourhalfofhearthavebeencold.YoutellthePagingerwithdisappointed:"Nothing."
Sinceheconnectsthemobilephonetopagingcenters,whydidhebuyamobile.Thatisabear!
Inthatdeepofnight,youwouldliketocrywithhim.Afterseveralscruple,youmadehistelephoneandgothistelephoneansweringmachine.Yousaid:"Itisme..."Thenyouhangedupthephonedepressedly.
Youencounteredhimnextday,heasked:"Didyoufindmeyesterday?whathappened?"
"Oh,nobigdeal.Nothingimportant."Youcanonlyreplythisway.
原文来自张小娴
《昨天晚上找不到他》
最讨厌午夜十二点钟就把电话关掉的男人.
某天夜里,你忽然想念他,很想告诉他你喜欢他.你鼓起勇气拨通他的电话号码,谁知道电话那一头传来他的留言说:
"我现在不能接这通电话,请你留下姓名……"
有什么比寂寞时只能听到他的留言更讨厌?
有些时候,他并没有关掉手提电话,而是把电话转驳到传呼台.那个晚上,你好想听听他的声音,谁知道电话接通,却是一把刻板的声音问:
"哪一位找机主?"
要不要传呼他呢?你的心已经冷了半截,你失望地跟传呼员说:"没事了."
既然把手提电话转驳到传呼台,那么要手提电话来干什么?真讨厌.
那个深夜,你好想向着他哭,你几经挣扎,拨通了他的电话号码,接电话的却是一台电话录音机,你说:"是我……"然后沮丧地挂了线.
第二天碰到他,他问:"你昨天是不是找过我,找我有什么事?"
"噢,没什么,只是一些不重要的事情罢了."你只好这样回答.